We’re continuing our Trusting God Series with the topic of control. When it comes to trust, we often struggle with surrender, as we’d much rather control all the outcomes. We like to control our work, our spouse, our kids, our finances, our health, our loss, and our pain. We think if we can control everything then we won’t get hurt or experience pain. Today we’ll discuss why control is an illusion.

“But I trust in you, Lord. I say, ‘You are my God.’”- Psalm 31:14

Control Is An Illusion

The first time I sent my fourth grader to summer camp for one week, I took his cute, little clothes and folded each outfit and placed it in a Ziploc bag with the day written on it. Day clothes and evening church clothes had separate bags, and it was an orderly system that I thought would help my random, non-sequential child function well or at least wear the right outfit. He returned from camp with several of those bags unopened. Twelve years later, when child number five went to her first summer camp I said, “You should go pack for camp.” And she did, all by herself, with no Ziploc bags in sight!

There are twelve years and three siblings between our oldest and youngest kids. I had major control issues with the first child, and eventually, I learned my control didn’t change outcomes at all. Ultimately, I created more work and worry for myself. Control is an illusion and trusting God is easier.

Why is it some of us like to control everything? And why is it the more out of control we feel, the more control we want to grab? It’s like the scene in I Love Lucy where she’s working at the factory boxing chocolates and the conveyor belt starts moving too fast. She can’t keep up so she starts stuffing the chocolates in her mouth. But eventually, she’s overcome and the whole system fails. We do that when life feels out of control, as we grasp for things to control so we’ll feel less out of control, but it usually leaves us exhausted.

There’s a better way as there is One who is in control, and He doesn’t need to give His power to us. God is capable, wise, powerful, and has good intentions for us. Why would we not accept His benevolence? Why would we believe the lie that He’s not for us?

The life of a Believer requires surrender, not control. Look at Jesus’ example, as His life was lived continuously surrender to His Father with His eventual death on the cross. The way of the cross is also where we must learn to live. “Not my will but yours be done” was not only Jesus lasts words, but it needs be the cry of our heart.

Often when pressure mounts, surrendering is far from our thoughts. We hold on tighter and try harder to control everything, to keep life from unraveling. Ultimately, control is an illusion. It’s not real as we strain, strive, pull and demand: it doesn’t change our outcomes. We think we have it all under control, but often it evaporates like the morning fog.

God is not opposed to organization and planning because those are effective ways to navigate life successfully. Control has more to do with our motives. Are you planning and scheming because your fearful and don’t believe God can handle your situation? If you answer yes, then it indicates you have some internal work to do with God.

How to release control

• The first step is gaining freedom is to recognize your need for control. Ask yourself what am I fearful of?

• Study the life of Jesus because He’s our best example of the surrendered life.

• Why is surrender difficult? Have people let you down? Has God let you down? Do you believe God isn’t capable of handling your situation?

• Surprisingly, pride can be the root of control. We think we can do better than God, or we know best for our situation.

• Start with small acts of surrender, as control is challenging for certain personalities. Practice a prayer of surrender each day and watch you ability to ”let go” increase.

• Learn to turn your face to God in the moments when you feel the need to control a situation. Release your situation to God and watch the peace flood your soul.

Dear God, I come to you today asking for forgiveness for the times I’ve wanted to control outcomes instead of deferring to your greatness. I want to live a surrendered life. I want you to be Lord over all, so in the moments when I’m afraid, help me turn to you. Thank you for leading and guiding my life. I place my trust in you for you are good. Amen.

In order to trust God, we have to recognize control is an illusion. He has ultimate control over our lives, and He is working all the good and bad things together for our good. He is worthy to be trusted. As you learn to live a surrendered life, you will find God is trustworthy. Be Encouraged!

I’ve included a free printable pdf. Click on the image below and you’ll receive, “Trusting God Series: 3 Things to Do When It’s Hard.”