He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. -2 Corinthian 1:4

Can We Talk?

I recognized the name in my direct messages from decades ago. We met through mutual friends and had kids of similar ages.  Anna reached out wanting to know if we could talk. I sent her a message welcoming a conversation.

I heard the heaviness in her voice as she held back tears. “I love my adult kids so much, and we have a great relationship, but I see changes in my son and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to mess this up,” she says.  Her adult son was raised in the church and went to a Christian college, and now his lifestyle is completely anti-God, and he told her he no longer believes in God.  

“I feel like such a failure,” she cried. “I remember feeling like that, too,” I sighed. “I didn’t know who to talk to about it. I can’t talk to people at church because they’ll judge me. I’m so worried I’m going to do something wrong to damage our relationship, and I don't want to do that,” she said. “I didn’t know where to turn, and I thought of you,” she said. We chatted for thirty minutes as she poured out her heartache. I silently whispered a prayer of thanks for God sent her my way. We need each other. I listened and encouraged as she felt relieved to talk about it.  

Unsupported Moms

We have an army of forgotten moms trying to navigate their changing roles with their adult children. They wonder where all the experts went. Where is the book “What to Expect When Your Child Reaches Adulthood?” 

Moms suffer in silence assuming they’ve completely ruined their kids. They carry grief and shame like boulders in backpacks, weighed down wherever they go. 

They tried their best and didn’t receive the outcome they’d hoped for, and now they feel lost. 

Moms like this are the reason I write, coach, and produce a weekly podcast, The Midlife Momma Podcast (click on it and you can listen in). 

I don’t want them to feel alone anymore. I’ve been parenting my five adult kids for fourteen years and everything about how I parent them has changed. Love is still the cornerstone of our connection, but I’ve had to move to a more supportive role rather than a directive stance.

I’ve failed, fallen, grown, and rallied. I’ll share what works and what does not. 

I want to encourage these seasoned moms and support them as they navigate the emotional rollercoaster of parenting their adult children. 

Share Your Story

My hope is moms like this will come out stronger as they begin to share their stories. Honestly, we’re so much more alike than different. When one mom takes a defiant step of courage and shares her struggles, she creates an avalanche where other moms can be swept up in the freedom. Freedom comes as we bring our heartache into the light of Christ.

I hope to create a safe space where you can bravely share your disappointments and triumphs, knowing there is an army of women who understand and will offer you support and compassion.

What if moms didn’t cower in shame anymore, but talked about the challenges of parenting adult kids? Instead of staying silent in our churches or bible studies, could we talk openly about our struggles? Could we see the power of bringing our stories into the light? 

What if by sharing your story, you encouraged another hurting mom? Vulnerability is the gateway to connection. You can read more about vulnerability here.

I’m reminded of the beauty of this passage: He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. - 2 Corinthian 1:4

Whenever you share your story, you provide comfort and strength to another hurting mom.

Moms, we are not forgotten, and we are not required to take this journey alone. God is waiting to help and pursue. Your connection with God will provide the stability and wisdom you need. Through prayer you’ll find strength to move forward.

We’ll not just address wayward kids, but all the complexities of this time in a mom’s life.

Here’s how I want to help you:

-Normalize our children wrestling with God.

-Help moms know it’s safe to come out of hiding and talk with other moms.

-Release control, expectations, criticism, fear, offense, and selfishness.

-Practice unconditional love for your adult kids.

-Handle the emotional overwhelm through connection with the Holy Spirit.

-Be responsible for the state of your heart.

-Relate to your adult child with respect and honor.

We need each other, mommas. I want to gather all these women and give them a big hug and tell them they’re going to make it.  Their children are held by God, too. God’s not done writing their stories. As moms, may we continue to pray and trust God, the author and perfecter of our faith.

 As moms, we need to support, encourage, and help each other, so we don’t feel alone.

 These are unchartered territories, but God is faithful. As we lean on Him, we can successfully navigate these unfamiliar days. 

Let’s pray together.

Dear Papa, I recognize my emotional overwhelm as I navigate this new season of my motherhood. Fill me with courage so I can share my story. I don’t want to cower or hide anymore. Help me be honest and bring my story into the light so it can comfort another mom.  Amen.

Still struggling?

I’ve created a free guide for you, Your Kids Are Grown…Now What? Just leave your name and email so I know where to send it.