”The tongue can bring death and life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.” -Proverbs 18:21

There’s a story of two brothers. The older son was treated fair and could stand up the the emotional abuse of his father, but the younger brother was not so fortunate. He could do nothing right in his fathers eyes, and his father caused great damage with his harsh words. The father was critical of everything the younger son did, and the words left lasting wounds of insecurity, doubt, self-loathing. Because the father told him he could never do anything right, he believed it.

Have you ever been the recipient of cruel words? Most of us have. Perhaps a family member or an acquaintance in school, or the neighborhood bully. Their bitter words cut to the core and leave us wounded for years. And every time someone speaks harshly to us, we bleed all over again.

Have you ever considered the power of your words as you walk through a difficult season, and how they effect your attitude? When we’re under stress we often resort to blame, by being critical of others or God. Or we make declarations like, “I can’t do this, it’s too hard!” or “This will never get better!” or “This is impossible!” There is life or death in your words, and it takes diligence to control them.

Control Your Tongue

• “Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble.” -Proverbs 21:23

• “If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless.” -James 1:26

• “In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. but a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself. People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, but no one can tame the tongue. -James 3:5

Speak Life

One of my favorite writers, Ann Voskamp has this to say about the words we speak: “Only speak words that make souls strong.” What we say has the power to carry life with it. So instead of saying negative things and being critical of others or harsh, we need to speak life. This includes our self-talk. Have you payed attention to what you speak over your own soul? Are you speaking life or death?

How to speak life:

• Run to the promises of God in the Word and speak them over your situation.

• Declare your trust in God.

• Tell yourself it’s going to be okay because God is at work.

• Take your thoughts captive first because we speak out of what we are thinking about. Think of good things, and then you can speak strong words of life.

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”- Philippians 4:8

• Learn what the Word says about you. Knowing your identity in Christ, as a son or daughter, is life changing. Walking in your true identity will help you talk positively over yourself.

There will be times we remember the harsh words spoken over us. Take the pain to God and lay it at His feet. Renew your mind with God’s thoughts towards you. They are all good and filled with love and compassion. Speak life to yourself and others, for it carries immense power.

Dear Papa, Help me be mindful of the words I speak, for they carry life or death. Heal me of the wounds from harsh words spoken over me. Renew my mind and help me to see myself as You see me, dearly loved, accepted, redeemed, and forgiven. Help me be diligent to study the Word so I know who I am in Christ. Holy Spirit help me control my tongue. May I be quick to pause before saying something I will regret. Help me speak life to myself and others, as I maintain a positive attitude. Amen.

Still struggling?

Maybe this will help.

I've included a guide to help you get to a better place with your attitude. Click on the image and leave your name and email so I know where to send it.