Christian Moms Guide: Four Strategies for Midlife Purpose
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“Your own ears will hear him. Right behind you a voice will say, ‘This is the way you should go, whether to the right or to the left.’”- Isaiah 30:21
A God Nudge
Hunched in my comfy chair, scrolling through Facebook, I came across a quiz, “Would You Be a Good Life Coach?” Curiosity and anticipation welled in my chest. “Oh, I’ve been thinking about life coaching for a while. I think I’d really like it and it sounds like a great way to help women.” I thought.
Child number five entered college. My nest was empty. I had a future ahead where I wouldn’t be focused on mothering. After 30 years of active parenting, “What could I do? What was I good at?” I wondered. I wanted to contribute financially to our family and build my own business.
Was I scared? Absolutely! But I needed to follow this God nudge.
I buzzed through the quiz and when I got the results, I checked every box. I didn’t have just a couple qualities, that made me an excellent coach. I had them all:
You’re a good listener
You’re intuitive
You like to encourage
You’re a planner
You’re good at motivating people
You like to help people reach their goals
You are patient
You are passionate about self-development
I was made for this!
Quietly, I heard God whisper, “This is what I have for you now. Go ahead. You’d make a great life coach.” Excitement mingled with trepidation, but I took the plunge. In the fall of 2019 I signed up with a reputable coach, for a 12 week training with Life Breakthrough Academy. It was exhilarating and overwhelming. The small cohort became a place of learning and growth.
Four years later, coaching empty nest moms is as fulfilling as I imagined.
On the Edge
How about you? Are you standing on the edge of midlife wondering what God has for you after your kids are grown?
We all wonder about it.
We may experience relief, nervousness, sadness, or despair as we realize our lives won’t revolve around motherhood. This is a significant shift, and it is not unusual to grieve for a bit. But God has more. The same Maker who led you as a mom, will take you by the hand and say, “Here, I have this for you now. Enjoy.”
God’s Perspective
Long ago the Israelites needed direction. They often went off on their own ways, but God faithfully called them back. He was a clarion call in the wilderness of disobedience and confusion.
Maybe you’ve felt a little lost too.
The prophet Isaiah spoke to the Israelites saying, “Your own ears will hear him. Right behind you a voice will say, ‘This is the way you should go,’ whether to the right or to the left.”- Isaiah 30:21
They were required to listen. They quieted their hearts and noted God's guiding voice. Once they heard it, they had to move in the way He asked them too. When they tuned in, they found their King’s voice leading their steps.
It will work the same for you, momma. As you seek God, He will guide you to His provision for this season of your life. Be still. Quiet your heart before Him and listen to what He says. He’s not done. It’s surely not over and there is good ahead for a mom who’s heart is set to follow God’s leading.
Four Strategies for Midlife Purpose:
1. Manage your mindset:
The surest way to reach success is to manage what you think about any situation. If you tell yourself life is over because your kids are grown, you’ll surely end up heartbroken and lost. If you convince yourself you’re too old or not talented enough to try something new, you’ll become frustrated. What you think about matters. Replace those limiting mindsets with these:
I can do new things.
I have gifts and talents to offer the world
I’m good at adapting
I have wisdom and life experience to share
I’m a competent learner
2. Celebrate your freedom:
Liberation should be the tagline for the empty nest season. You’ll experience the rush of freedom as your life is no longer tethered to endless trips to ball games, rehearsals, or shuttling kids around.
You get to do what you want, when you want. You have complete freedom to choose how you spend your time and with whom you live your days. It’s exhilarating! It might be the best part about this season of your life. Embrace it with gusto and watch your happiness soar.
3. Embrace your curiosity.
Start asking yourself questions without judgment. Become inquisitive. Don’t disqualify yourself. Instead, be an outside observer at your own life and ask yourself these questions:
What am I naturally good at?
What sets my soul on fire?
What could I talk about for one hour without notes?
What do other people say I’m good at?
Instead of being stuck in what you should do, you have the space to embrace what you were made to do. This opening comes through being curious about the way God wired you, then following those thoughts to His good plans.
4. Fulfill your dreams.
Maybe you have a long lost dream.You’ve tucked the longing away for decades but now is the time to come out of hiding. Midlife is the perfect time to bring it into the light. Start praying about it again and ask God if now is the time. If He gives you a “yes” then jump in! You may find the fulfillment you’ve longed for. You’re not too old and it’s not too late. Many of the most successful people didn’t reach their prime until later in life: Charles Darwin, Ray Croc, Martha Steward, Vera Wang, Julia Child. This truly could be your most fulfilling season.
We will all face the reality that motherhood as we’ve known it ends. We weren’t meant to be active parents forever. This isn’t God’s plan for us. Instead of bemoaning the change, view it as a great opportunity to step into a new purpose. When we lean into God’s whispers and do what He says, we’ll be amazed at what we discover.
Let’s pray.
Dear Papa, Thank you for this season of my life. Just because my kids are grown does not mean my work is done. Lead me to Your good plans for Me. Open my heart and ears to hear and follow Your leading. Help me not be afraid to walk into the dreams You have placed within me. Help me embrace this freedom with gusto. Amen.
Still struggling?
Grab my free guide, Your Kids Are Grown….Now What? It’s a four page guide to help you understand the three different phases of midlife motherhood. You’ll move from the Empty-Feeling mom, the Questioning Mom, and the Celebratory mom. The guide will help you see what to expect next.
Just leave your name and email so I know where to send it.
