Do You Dream Big?

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. - Ephesians 3:20

Let’s Dream Together

The sun shone brightly through the canopy of green as hubby and I gathered on the porch. Birds chirped happily as I whispered a silent “thank you God for this beautiful day and my life with my husband.” With a steaming cup of coffee in hand, he reached for a book, The Story of Marriage, by John and Lisa Bevere. 

Listening, I leaned in for our weekly rhythm of reading so we can strengthen our marriage. In order to learn and grow in our marriage, we are intentional students. Surely, growth is required as our children leave home, and we focus on each other. 

He opened the book to a worksheet, How to Dream Big and began to read. Listening, my mind drifted to what we had built thus far. 

We wanted a marriage focused on God, a houseful of children, and a home where everyone felt safe. Both of us came from disordered homes. We experienced divorce, abuse, dysfunction, and rare mention of God. We wanted something better for our marriage. We had big dreams. 

But what about now? I thought. How can we dream for this empty nest season? 

I gathered two pieces of paper and pens as we sat in the quiet summer morning and asked God to help us dream. Thoughts came quickly as we each jotted down ideas, then we looked towards each other and shared our lists. 

I was encouraged by how many of our dreams overlapped. Out poured visions of travel, retirement income, Cousin Camp, less work and more play, and pursuing meaningful friendships, which is no small feat for a ministry couple.

Have you ever written your dreams down with your husband?

We will all come to the day when the kids are grown and gone. It can feel unsettling. We have so many questions when we are first learning to be together without our kids.

  • How do I connect with my mate?

  • How do we become a strong team?

  • What does God want for us in this season of our marriage?

  • How do we find a new rhythm in our marriage when we aren’t focused on parenting?

Dreaming together is a way to find direction and vision for our future. As we partner with God, He’ll reveal the direction He wants us to head. “Dreaming together allows you and your mate to honestly share from your hearts and envision the amazing things you can do together by the strength, wisdom, favor and provision of God,” says John Bevere.

There is no limit to what God can do, as we center our hearts on Him and our partner. We have permission to dream as we trust God’s sufficiency for our marriage. “Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.” - Ephesians 3:20

How about you? Are you ready to dream with your spouse?

The Value of Dreaming Together

1. Dreaming reorients your hearts to each other.

Selfishness holds no place in marriage, yet many struggle to honor their mate over their own agenda.  As you shift your thoughts to less selfish pursuits, it expands your vision for what you can achieve together. The love and bond you share is strengthened when you are united in purpose.  

When you  dream of your future together, you’ll find tenderness returning as you grow and are refined through your marriage. God brought you together for a purpose. Instead of allowing the stressors of life to tear you apart, choose to invite God to make you whole through the refining process of togetherness. 

2. Dreaming reorients your heart to God.

You and your husband are one. A force of nature to be used in the Kingdom of God to bring about change and good. Have you ever thought about the story God wants to write with your marriage?

 When you dream together with God, His will becomes yours and you step into a marvelous vision for the future.  The cry of your hearts becomes, “your will be done in and through us.” As we focus on God, He strengthens our bond and leads us to meaningful discoveries in this midlife season.

3. Dreaming gives you a clear vision of what to do next.

How can you know which way to head in your marriage if there isn't a clear vision? Dreams only come true when we make tangible daily choices to achieve them. 

What decisions will you make to achieve your dreams? How will you spend money and  time? How will you prioritize achieving your dreams? As you define what you value most in your marriage, then you can set short-term, medium-term, and long-term goals to achieve your dreams

4. Dreaming helps you move past survival mode.

According to John Bevere, “Many married couples live in survival mode. But God doesn’t want marriages that survive, He wants them to thrive.” Dreaming helps you move past barely surviving to find purpose and intention in your marriage. God’s heart for you is that you would prosper in your marriage with healthy communication, deep affection and unconditional love. As you dream with God, He expands your marriage. It’s the sweetest gift. 

We don’t have to fear our empty nest marriage, Instead, we can see it as an opportunity to dream. As we continually pursue God and each other, He’ll accomplish incredible goals as we partner with Him and our spouse, in the process. 

Let’s pray.

Dear Papa, thank You for my marriage. Help me to view this season as an opportunity to pursue fresh dreams with my husband. Unite us in purpose and heart and You reveal Your good plans for our future. Guide our steps and allow us to dream with You. Amen.

Still struggling?

Grab my free guide, Marriage Awareness Worksheet. As a Midlife Mindset Coach for Moms, I love to ask powerful questions. This prayerful guide contains a series of questions you will work through to gain clarity on how you can have a more fulfilling marriage. The activity is just between you and God, as He provides the insight you need. 

Leave your name and email so I know where to send it.

Do you and your husband struggle to handle conflict in healthy ways? Check out episode 51 of The Midlife Momma Podcast, 4 Healthy Ways to Handle Conflict in Your Marriage.