The Joy of Vulnerability With God

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vulnerability with god

“Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, and in the hidden part [of my heart] You will make me know wisdom.”- Psalm 51:6 AMP

We are continuing in our Building a Close Relationship with God Series with the topic of vulnerability.  Do you struggle to be vulnerable with God? Does shame have the opposite effect and cause you to hide from Him?  It could be a reason you don’t feel close to Him.

I Messed Up Again

I blew it again. I wanted to be a patient, loving mom. I could be calm and gentle but if things escalated my inclination was to be bossy and brash. I demanded obedience, and my kid’s disrespect was hard to handle.  I especially felt like a failure with my son Caleb. He was an active boy with a strong will who wanted to call the shots. I felt exasperated most of the time. One frustrating morning, Holy Spirit gently asked, “why are you so angry with Caleb?”  I was shocked at first. But Holy Spirit was right, I was frustrated and I’d respond in anger, which was just escalating every interaction with my wild boy. 

I was filled with shame and regret each time I responded harshly to him.  This mothering was the one thing I was called to do and I felt like I failed every day.  I wanted to hide from God. I was humiliated and embarrassed by my behavior. After all, my kids were just little humans who deserved grace, patience, and gentle training. 

The last thing I wanted to do was sit before God and confess my failure.  I had this idea that in order to come before God I needed to perform perfectly and then He would accept me.  What a destructive lie of the Enemy to keep me from God. The more I messed up the less I wanted to be close to God.   

pamela henkelman quote

When I chose to be vulnerable and confess my sin, God met me with overwhelming love.  He understood my shame and met me with deep compassion and a plan to help me respond better. 

I only wish I had been honest with God sooner.

Benefits of Vulnerability With God:

  • There’s nothing we can hide from the Almighty.  He knows our every thought and deed, and yet He loves us.

  • When we open our hearts and minds to Him, it shows we trust Him.

  • God always handles us gently and with compassion when we are honest.

  • The quicker we confess, the sooner we are forgiven.  We simply ask God to extend His grace to us and He does.

  • God does not keep account of our sins.  “As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.”- Psalm 103:12 

  • As we learn to be vulnerable with God, we will learn to be vulnerable in other relationships.

  • When we handle the hard parts of our lives, God brings healing, whether it’s sin or pain.  God is waiting to heal us if we’ll risk vulnerability.

Being honest with God about my parenting frustrations opened the door for me to be honest with God about everything.  I no longer fear Him or feel shame as I approach Him with sin, pain, or lack. I know His love for me is not dependent on my performance.  I feel His delight over me every time. He’s the one I want to talk to most to process hard things. 

Dear Papa, Please help me understand I don’t have to hide from you when I don’t perform the way I think I should.   Your love for me is not dependent on my performance. When I sin or fall short of your best for me, help me be quick to run to You so we can talk it through and You can help me.  I want to be free to come to you with all my ugly parts and my pain. I don’t want to fear to be vulnerable with You. I’m so glad you already know me, and still, you love me. Thank you for receiving me with love and compassion.  Help me be brave at being vulnerable with you. Amen.

Still struggling?

Maybe this will help.

I’ve included a free guide to help you build a close relationship with God. Simply click on the image below and leave your name and email so I know where to send it.