7 Ways to Pray for Your Adult Children

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“Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you will receive it and it will be yours.”-Mark 11:24

If you don’t pray for your adult child, who will?

These words were whispered to my heart, by the Holy Spirit, one morning as I sat with God. The velocity of the truth ripped through my soul. It got me wondering about who was actually praying for my children.  Perhaps my married children’s spouse’s did. Perhaps close friends. Maybe friends from their small group. Certainly my husband prayed for them and their grandma interceded on their behalf. Probably my son and daughter in law's parents prayed for our kids. 

 What about my grown children who weren’t walking with God? Who’s praying for them?

The Spiritual Folks

 We want the more spiritual folks to do the praying: the pastors, pastor’s wives, spiritual leaders, and missionaries.They know exactly what to pray and how to pray it. We feel more comfortable agreeing with their prayers.  We want to believe our children are supported through prayer, but in reality, the list is probably quite short. 

 If I’m one of the few people praying for my grown children, how does that impact my prayer life? It got me wondering:

  •  Could prayer be my first response instead of my last resort? 

  • What if I stepped away from formal prayers and just talked to God about what was going on in my grownup kid’s lives? 

  • What if I released control and surrendered it all to God?

  •  What would it look like if I exchanged my worries for confidence in God?

  •  What if I replaced doubt with faith?

  •  What if I allowed a mustard seed of faith to grow concerning my offspring? 

  • What if prayer were the antidote to distress?

How about you? Are you praying for your adult children?

Are you purposeful to intercede on your child’s behalf. As a mom, it’s a privilege and honor to bow before God for what our children need. We’re not trying to change them because we know only God can do that. Through prayer we partner with God to fulfill His purposes and plans in our children’s  lives.

Once our children reach adulthood, moms often struggle with the desire to “fix” our children. We want to offer solutions, make suggestions and ease their pain. Stormie Omartian, in her book, The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children, said, “We all need to understand that we can’t “fix” or “change” our adult children. Only God can make changes that last in anyone. Our job is to release our adult children into God’s hands and then pray for the Lord to make changes in them and their lives according to His will.”

Let’s get practical. Here are seven ways to pray for your adult kids:

1. God, help my child know You more.

Everything good from God first comes from knowing Him intimately. We can say we know who the president of the US is but most of us don’t know him. It can go like that with God. Our kids can know about God but they don’t really know him. 

That’s why it’s powerful to pray that your children actually know God. Pray they understand what He’s about, His character, and His ways. Everyone who knows God wants to know Him more. This leads to a life-giving relationship with God instead of religious ritual that results in a stale relationship.

“My soul, wait quietly for God alone, for my expectation is from Him.” Psalm 62:5     

2. God, guide my child each day.

Thankfully you are supported by a God who longs to be the leader of your life. He feels that way about your offspring too. He’s concerned about every detail of your child’s life. He has a good plan and will lead your adult child to it, if they are surrendered.

Praying your children would release her/his plans for His purposes will lead them to the abundant life your kid is looking for. How kind of our Tender Shepherd to lead your child in every way.

"I am God, your God, who teaches you how to live right and well. I will show you what to do, where to go.”- Isaiah 48:17          

3. God, give my child  the capacity to endure hardship with grace.

Unfortunately your children will walk through hard times. The Good Book said it would be so. Your child will likely experience stress, loss, heartache, sickness, and emotional overwhelm. It’s the result of living in a fallen world.

 But thankfully you have a compassionate God who gives your child strength and His loving presence. God will comfort, strengthen, and equip your child to handle hardship with grace and reliance on Him.

“Endure suffering along with me, as a good soldier of Christ Jesus.”- 2 Timothy 2:3

4. God, give my child healthy relationships.

 It matters who your adult children surround themselves with. You long for your child to have rich friendships and a loving spouse, if marriage is God’s will for their life. You know full well the devastations that come when your children are surrounded by the wrong people.

Thankfully, you can ask God to bring healthy people into your child’s life. As you intercede, you partner with God in helping your child make wise choices in their relationships. This is a gift to them and you.

“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.”- Ecclesiastes 4:9

5. God, help my child find fulfilling work.

  Your child’s identity doesn’t come from what they do, but it doesn’t hurt if your child finds contentment in his work. It’s beneficial when your child understands how God has wired them and pursues work in his area of strength and expertise. 

Ask the Lord to infuse your child with wisdom and the internal strength to pursue their passions. Ask God to fill them with the ability to endure, persevere, and grow in the workplace.

“Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.”-Colossians 3:23

6. God, help my child be wise and discerning.

Proverbs are littered with probabilities for what happens to fools and it’s not good. Many a life is ruined by foolish choices, patterns, and behaviors. 

Proverbs is also filled with insights on what happens to the wise. We know wisdom comes from time spent with God. Pray your child would partner with God and be infused with Godly wisdom so they can be discerning all their days.

"For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth comes knowledge and understanding".- Proverbs 2:6

7. God, help my child realize their need for you.

Your child is inundated with cultural messages about self-reliance and independence. They hear things like: “You are enough.” “You can have it all.” “It’s up to you.” Initially these ring true, except they leave the need for God out of the equation.

But you know it’s in realizing your need for God is when God truly moves in your child’s life. As your child understands their lack and falls into the arms of God’s grace, He supplies everything your child needs.

 “Hear me lord and answer me for I am poor and needy.” Psalm 86:1.

Prayer is important and God has placed a holy calling over your life, momma. Your prayers matter and you can have a lasting impact concerning your adult children. May prayer be your first inclination the moment worry bubbles to the surface. Let it be your cue to bow your head and pray. God will meet you there.

Let’s pray.

Dear Papa, Help me never stop praying for my grown children. I know I’m not responsible to fix anything but through prayer I unite my heart with Yours as You do the work in my child’s life. Draw them to You. Fill them with the desire to know You more everyday. Amen.

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