Holiday Grace: Navigating Family Gatherings with an Adult Child Who Rejects Christianity
/“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint”.- Isaiah 40:31
Holiday Tension
It felt like a rubber band was stretched across her chest as Julia scraped the dinner plates and loaded the dishwasher. Her daughter Maddie would be returning home for her break from university. Fear rushed in as Julia thought about their last difficult interaction.
Julia was aloof and tense that weekend. She just didn’t seem like herself. Julia sensed something was going on but she couldn’t get Maddie to talk. She woke Maddie up Sunday morning and said, “It’s time for church, Babe.” “I’m not going.” Julia barked. Aghast, she yelled back. “What do you mean you’re not going? As long as you live in this house, you’ll go to church with your dad and I.” “You can’t make me,” she hollered.
Julia quietly closed the bedroom door and slumped away to her bedroom to cry. “Where did I go wrong, Lord? she wailed, as tears stained her pillow. “She’s so far from you and I feel like an utter failure. Please help me.” she prayed.
Reflecting over the weekend, Julia noticed every time she reached out to connect with Maddie, it felt like her walls were up. “Maybe she sensed my judgment?” she wondered. “Maybe I was unnecessarily harsh?” she thought. Just thinking about spending time with her daughter over the holidays stressed her out. “Lord, there’s got to be a better way. Please help me,” she prayed, as she wiped off the counters.
Does Julia’s story ring true for you? Do you identify with the heartache, pressure, and shame a mom carries when her grown child rejects her faith?
Are you flooded with questions:
Why God?
Where did I go wrong?
What will others think of me?
What if they experience complete separation from God?
How can we get along when we disagree?